What to Expect When Starting Therapy
Deciding to start therapy can feel uncomfortable, especially if you have never been before. You might not know what to expect, worry that you won't know what to talk about, or wonder whether what you're dealing with is even something you should be in therapy for. It is also common to feel nervous about being vulnerable with someone you have never met.
You don't need to have everything figured out before starting therapy. You also don't need to be in crisis. Sometimes people come to therapy because they have been struggling with anxiety, feeling overwhelmed, having difficulty in their relationships, or noticing that the same patterns keep coming up in their lives. Other times, they aren't entirely sure what the problem is, they just know that something doesn't feel right.
What to Expect When Starting Therapy
My approach to therapy is collaborative. In the beginning, we will spend some time talking about what brought you in, what has been going on recently, and what you would like to change. We may also talk about your relationships, your past experiences, and some of the patterns you have noticed in yourself.
I don't expect you to come into the first session knowing exactly what you need or being able to explain everything clearly. Part of therapy is figuring that out together. I also don't believe that you should have to share everything right away. We can move at a pace that feels comfortable and appropriate for you.
As we get a better understanding of what is going on, we can decide together what would be most helpful. Depending on your needs, this might include practical strategies for anxiety or ADHD, exploring relationship and attachment patterns, or working through experiences that continue to affect you.
How Therapy Can Help With Anxiety
Anxiety can affect much more than how you feel in the moment. It can make it difficult to relax, make decisions, sleep, concentrate, or feel confident in yourself. Some people experience constant worry or overthinking, while others notice anxiety through avoidance, irritability, physical symptoms, or needing reassurance.
Therapy can help you understand what is contributing to your anxiety and why certain situations are so difficult. We can work on recognizing patterns, developing coping strategies, and changing the ways anxiety influences your thoughts, behaviour, and relationships. The goal isn't to eliminate anxiety completely, but to help you feel more capable of managing it without it controlling your life.
ADHD Therapy for Adults
ADHD can affect many areas of adult life, including organization, time management, motivation, emotional regulation, work, and relationships. Many adults with ADHD have spent years feeling frustrated with themselves because they know what they need to do but have difficulty actually getting it done.
Therapy can be useful for understanding how ADHD affects you personally and finding strategies that are realistic for your life. It can also help with some of the self-criticism and frustration that can develop after years of feeling like you are not meeting your own expectations.
Therapy for Trauma and Past Experiences
Our past experiences can continue to affect how we respond to situations in the present. This can show up in relationships, anxiety, self-esteem, emotional reactions, or difficulty feeling safe and connected to other people.
Trauma therapy does not mean that you have to immediately talk through every difficult experience you have had. We can first focus on creating a sense of safety and understanding how those experiences are affecting you now. When appropriate, I also use EMDR to help people process experiences that continue to feel unresolved or affect their everyday lives.
Couples Therapy and Relationship Issues
Relationship difficulties are another common reason people seek therapy. You may find that you and your partner have the same arguments repeatedly, struggle to communicate without becoming defensive, or feel disconnected despite still caring deeply about each other.
In couples therapy, we look beyond the individual argument and try to understand the patterns that develop between partners. Often, both people are reacting to something underneath the immediate conflict, but it can be difficult to see that when you are caught in the cycle. Therapy provides a space to slow things down, understand each other's experiences, and work toward more effective communication and connection.
When Is the Right Time to Start Therapy?
There isn't one point at which you are considered “struggling enough” to start therapy. You can seek therapy when something is interfering with your life, when you are having difficulty coping with a change, or simply when you want to understand yourself better.
If you have been considering therapy but feel unsure about taking the first step, you don't need to know exactly what you want to work on before reaching out. We can start with where you are now and figure out together what would be most helpful.
Starting therapy can feel like a big decision, but it doesn't have to be. It is simply an opportunity to have some support while you work through things that have been difficult to manage on your own.